I'm definitely not an elephant

I'm leaving work at lunchtime today to drive up to Small Jen's for the weekend. I wanted to go swimming at the gym this morning, so last night I had to pack my suitcase for the weekend, pack my gym bag and also get together all the stuff I said I would take up to Jen's.

I put my swimming costume on this morning then got dressed over the top of it and headed out. Between leaving the house and getting to the office, I realised I had: -

Left my make-up bag at home
Forgotten to pick up the DVDs I said I would bring
Not brought a towel for the gym
Put my bra and knickers for today in my suitcase instead of my gym bag

By the time I realised my underwear mistake I was only wearing a towel (the one I had had to hire from the gym for £1) so I couldn't exactly go out to the car and get them. I had to get dressed without said bra and knickers, then when I got to the car I took them out of my suitcase and put them in my handbag, then I went commando into the office and headed straight for the toilets to put them on...

As if that weren't embarrassing enough, I had to buy petrol this morning so I stopped at Tesco on the way into work. I bought a packet of sweets at the same time, for the 5-hour journey this afternoon. I was just getting into my car when the tannoy sprang to life: 'The lady at pump number 6, you've forgotten your sweets!' I immediately made to get out of the car and go back to the kiosk so as not to draw any more attention to myself than had already been, but not before the woman on the tannoy had time to say 'The blonde lady in the blue car, you've left your sweets on the counter! Oh, it's OK Alan, she's coming now.' By this point everyone on the forecourt - which, of course, was packed - was looking at me and laughing, although to be fair I think they were laughing more at the style of the tannoy announcement than at me personally...